So, if you haven’t already seen it I have posted the second short story of the Tre Alee S~Factor Series on the website. If you have already read it, thank you and I hope you enjoyed it. If not, get to reading

The story is dear to my heart even though it’s fiction. Throughout my existence I have come close to ending my life because of personal struggles and not loving myself AT ALL. I didn’t like what I saw in the mirror, my body frame, my hair…just basically I wasn’t too fond of ME. Also being a Pentecostal preacher’s kid I have seen how many people get treated because of their differences. I’ve seen people hurt over their sexuality, not having on the right attire, not smelling their best etc. and it was hurtful seeing it come from “Christian Church folks”.

I’m not saying that all churches or church goers are bad people, but we can be some of the worse ones to inflict uncessary pain on others different from us. I have to say though, I’m grateful that I never witnessed that cruelty from my father who is still an active pastor and bishop. His compassion, understanding and love showed me how I wanted to be. He stood, and still does, firm on his beliefs but he never judged. He simply showed love without it being mistaken for condoning bad or unfamiliar behaviors.

As a result of wanting to end my life on more than two occasions and being hurt from church folks, I had to literally turn to my only source of help, God. Now today I can say that I’m growing and happy even though I’m still healing and learning. I have favor over my life that I never thought possible to have. This is what prompted me to write, Self Rigteous Hypocrites (Church Folks). We all just need to learn to show compassion and love at all times. There is life and death in your tongue so watch what you say to and about people.

Well that’s enough of the serious stuff, again please read the story and spread the word to others about it. Also leave me a comment to tell me what you think. Feel free to ask me questions about it as well.

Below is just a taste of Self Righteous Hypocrites (Church Folks). Enjoy!

S-Factor

An S-Factor Short: Self Righteous Hypocrites (Church Folks)

by admin on May.17, 2010, under S-Factor 

SILENT Turmoil 

I keep staring at the bottle of sleeping pills next to my bed and the only thing I can hear at a steady rhythm is my heart even though the television volume is up. I’ve been sitting here at the side edge of my bed for about an hour, smelling the aroma of straight Hennessey that I poured in a greenish blue cocktail glass. While remaining emotionless, I pick up my wallet to look at my driver’s license to observe how different the person in the photo is from the person contemplating taking a final breath. The state of Massachusetts is written across the top portion of the plastic ID in blue writing and my name is typed in black as, Prestine, April D. As soon as I realize that the same day I took that license picture was another day of unanswered questions and depression, I took a large gulp from the glass. I squeeze my eyes tightly together and when I open them, a tear slides down my cheek. I’m not exactly sure why since I haven’t been able to cry for weeks. Liquor is the only logical reason why water has seeped through my tear ducts. 

As I sit here I begin looking at the pill bottle again and decide to pour its contents on the nightstand. From the looks of it there are at least fifteen white pills in front of me that appear to be a permanent remedy for my soul’s pain. One by one I begin popping them in my mouth, chasing them down my scratchy throat with Hennessey. I have relived this day repeatedly in my head, but I honestly didn’t think it would come. I figured that it would always be a vision in my mind that I would be too scared to really follow through with. Well I was wrong …